Jason Webley: Friends, family, complete strangers; we are gathered here today on the 10th day of November in the year 2010 to celebrate the union of this Man and his statue Bride.
Do you, a man of flesh and blood, take this statue of stone, metal, wood or plastic to love and to cherish, to worship and protect, and to honor until death, erosion or act of vandalism do you part?
And do you, a statue, take this unlikely but magnificent amalgamation of tissue, blood and bone to honor and protect, to love and cherish until death, erosion of act of vandalism do you part?
By whatever powers might be vested in me by any governing
bodies or deities, living dying or dead, I declare you man and wife. You may kiss the bride.